Consistency in Life 生命中的一致性

(附中文) Living a balanced life is like writing a good storyline for a consulting deck – you always need to have strong consistency from the beginning to the end. There are two kinds of consistency: (1) consistency between who you are and how you perceive yourself; (2) consistency between how you perceive yourself and how others perceive you.

For the first consistency, you explore, try and learn from it. Just need some time to figure it out and be honest to yourself, then it won’t be a big problem. However, for the second kind of consistency, it requires lots of efforts. You need to confirm your value and belief system and make sophisticated decisions on actions, so others can view you as the way that you view yourself. Some people might say: “I don’t care how others view me,” but in the end, the discrepancy will lead to self-doubt, cynic and lack of passion.

You can definitely change your mind, have new thoughts and set new criteria on the way, but at each moment, you need to be fully consistent in your values and actions to ultimately have inner peace and mental balance. It’s not easy, but glad that we are on the way now.

如何擁有一個平衡的人生?或許關鍵就在於「一致性」吧!我認為一致性包含兩種:(1) 「真實自我」和「自我認知」之間的一致性;(2) 「自我認知」和「他人對我的認知」之間的一致性。

第一種「真實自我」與「自我認知」之間的一致性比較容易達成,只要花點時間多加探索、並且對自己誠實,應該不難達成一致。然而,第二種「自我認知」和「他人對我的認知」之間的一致性卻需要我們投注相當的心力才有辦法達成。首先,必須確認自身的價值與信仰體系,包含清晰的定義與明確的優先順序;其次,基於這樣的價值與信仰體系,決定自身的行為舉止。唯有經過這樣謹慎的、由內而外的過程,才能確保「自我認知」和「他人對我的認知」之間達成一致。

或許會有人說「我才不在乎別人怎麼看待我呢!」然而,因為這種想法而導致的「不一致性」很容易讓我們產生自我懷疑、感到憤世嫉俗、對世界失去熱情。

從頭至尾的一致性非常重要,但並不意味著改變就是壞事。在成長過程中,我們當然可以改變心意、調整人生優先順序,但關鍵在於:每個當下,我們的價值體系和行為舉止之間必須是一致的。唯有這樣,我們才能與自己和平共處、達到心靈平衡。

這確實很不容易,但很高興我們已經啟程了。加油!

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